Hodja's wife and his Donkey

When his wife died, the Hodja became very sorry, but he mourned for her only a few days.

After a while his donkey died and he was even more sorrowful and mourned for him many months.

People asked him why and he answered:  When my wife died, they all said, they could find a younger and better one for me, but when my donkey died, nobody offered the same service.

Hodja and God

The Hodja was traveling from a long way away, he got very tired and decided to rest. Then he prayed: Dear God, he said. Please send me a donkey!

A few minutes later, he saw a man riding on a horse and leading a young donkey. The man came nearer, stopped beside him and shouted: You, leprous man! Instead of starving there, come on carry the donkey, it is tired.

Although the Hodja said, that he was also tired, the tyrannical man beat him with a stick and so the poor Hodja took the donkey on his shoulders.

Then the man on the horse proceeded on his way.

Every time the Hodja slowed down, the man beat him and after many miserable hours, they reached the town, where the man let the Hodja go, without thanking him.

Then the Hodja fall down on the earth and slept many hours. When he awakened he murmured
Oh, God! What happened? Was it that I couldn't explain, or that you couldn't understand?

How A Donkey Reads

During a conversation with Tamerlane, Hodja started bragging about his donkey.

"It is so smart that I can teach it even how to read, "he said.

"Then go ahead and teach it reading. I give you 3 months.," Tamerlane ordered.

Hodja went home and began to train his donkey. He put its feed between the pages of a big book and taught it to turn the pages by its tongue to find its feed. Three days before the three month period was over, he stopped feeding it.

When he took his donkey to Tamerlane, he asked for a big book and put it in front of the donkey. The hungry animal turned the pages of the book one by one with its tongue and when it couldn't find any feed between the pages it started braying.

Tamerlane watched the donkey closely and then said,

"This is sure a strange way of reading!"

Hodja remarked,

"But this is how a donkey reads."

Mortal's way

One day four boys approached Hodja and gave him a bagful of walnuts.

"Hodja, we can't divide these walnuts among us evenly. So would you help us, please?"

Hodja asked, "Do you want God's way of distribution or mortal's way?"

"God's way" the children answered.

Hodja opened the bag and gave two handfuls of walnuts to one child, one handful to the other, only two walnuts to the third child and none to the fourth.

"What kind of distribution is this?" the children asked baffled.

"Well, this is God's way," he answered. "He gives some people a lot, some people a little and nothing to others. If you had asked for mortal's way I would have given the same amount to everybody."

Criticism

Hodja and his son went on a journey once. Hodja preferred that his son ride the donkey and that he himself go on foot.
On the way they met some people who said: -Look at that healthy young boy! That is today's youth for you. They have no respect for elders. He rides on the donkey and makes his poor father walk!

When they had passed by these people the boy felt very ashamed and insisted that he walk and his father ride the donkey. So Hodja mounted the donkey and the boy walked at his side. A little later they met some other people who said:

-Well, look at that! That poor little boy has to walk while his father rides the donkey.

After they had passed by these people, Hodja told his son:

-The best thing to do is for both of us to walk. Then no one can complain.

So they continued on their journey, both of them walking. A little ways down the road they met some others who said:

-Just take a look at those fools. Both of them are walking under this hot sun and neither of them are riding the donkey!

Hodja turned to his son and said: - That just goes to show how hard it is to escape the opinions of men.

Thank God

On a moonlit night, the Hodja saw in his backyard a white figure. Thinking it might be a burglar, he asked his wife to hand him the bow and an arrow. He took aim and let the arrow fly, right on target.

The Hodja waited until daybreak to go into his backyard. He was shocked to see that what he thought was a burglar was his own cloak that his wife washed and hung on the clothesline.

He kneeled down and repeated, “Thank God! Thank God!”

His wife asked, “Why are you thanking God?” and the Hodja replied, “Sure I have to thank God. I managed to strike right in the middle of the cloak. Just imagine what would have happened if I were in it!”

Making a living

One of the Hodja’s two sons was a making a living from growing produce in his orchard, and the other was making his living from making clay jugs and pitchers.

Hodja asked the first son how he was doing and the son said, “This year I planted all sorts of things. If there’s enough rain, I will be fine. But if it doesn’t rain, Mom will shed tears for me.”

Hodja went to his other son and asked how he was doing and the second son said, “This year I mixed a lot of earth and water. If it doesn’t rain, everything will be just fine. But if it rains, Mom will shed tears for me.”

When the Hodja went home, his wife asked how the sons were doing and he answered, “I don’t know about the boys, but whether it rains or not, you’re going to shed a lot of tears.”